Friday, April 04, 2008

Get out alive.

My very, very, short term goal is just that, to get out alive. April 1,2008 we lost another officer at the prison.

"Tim Healy," husband, father, correction officer.

Tim called in sick for the midnight shift, said he must have the flu. He also said he had a doctors appointment for 9:00 am. He never made it, Tim died of a stroke at 4:00am. He was 51 years young.

So yesterday my friend Ken and I made a long drive to Shinglehouse Pa. to go to yet another wake for one of our own. Tim made that same long drive to get to work everyday, because he loved his country home and Shinglehouse is a good place to raise his children. He would come to work, do a double shift, stay over in a room close to the jail, do a second double shift , then make the 65 mile drive home to his family for four days. He talked about retiring in 5 years, and he would show pictures of his kids and family at a drop of a hat.

Tim had a very troubled first marriage that took a toll on his sanity and health. He lived through a very dark period and got out of it. He would dwell on his lose of identity as a devote Catholic as he worried about his fate and excommunication. For a fee the church was going to make it all better for Tim. That was ten years ago.........

After major depression and more drugs then any ten men should have to take, Tim functioned, but not as well as the very sharp college grad I knew in 1988. Well as luck would have it he got a second shot at true happiness. He met a lady, fell in love and he and his young son were once again in a happy family.

Tim never got over the church, nor the drugs he had to take. Between the two, in my opinion it killed him.

The three people that have died at my jail in the last three months were all 51 years old.


Odat said...

I'm so sorry....
Now you've got to take care of you...
Happy Retirement!

MarmiteToasty said...

Oh my....... Im so very sorry to read this sad news about your friend..... please please get out as soon as you can.... you have such a wonderful time awaiting you on your farmstead....

Will be thinking about you and your friends family... so very sad to read this...


Ol' Lady said...

That sucks! :(

I'll be checkin in on ya...and had better hear something from you on the 29th or 30th!!! If I don't see something here to celebrate at the end of the month then I'm comin down there...don't make me have to travel...I gots too much to do here :)

Susan said...

Thank you for your story about my brother Tim. I can't begin to tell you how much my family appreciated all the corrections officers who came for the honor guard and to pay their respects.

While it is true that Tim suffered many trials and tribulations along the path of life one thing remained constant: his big heart and love of people. That legacy is his gift to us.

We take comfort in the belief that Tim's troubles are now over and that he has been received in the arms of the angels.

HopeSpringsATurtle said...

You are on what I hope is a sure path to happiness. Stay strong and my condolences for your recent losses. My husbands family is from Johnsonburg, so another interesting convergence of degrees of separation.

I wish you and your family the best Slip, and know you are not alone in the world.

Fr. Peter Doodes said...

So sad to hear about Tim.

You mentioned that for his second marriage "Tim and his young son were once again in a happy family."
It seems then that any fault was certainly not due to Tim so how any 'minister' can assume that God is content with people being unhappy is 100% beyond me.

This isn't the first time I have heard of this as I have married people of Tim's branch of Christianity that have been through what may well be similar problems.

I always think that you can sum up a person by the company they keep, so bless you for sticking by him through the good times and the bad, he was obviously blessed with amazing friends, says more than words ever can or will.



Gina said...

Oh, how sad.

It must take a such a strong person to do your job.

Lisa Parsons said...

Please know how saddened and empty we feel about the loss of Tim. My husband and I were classmates of Tims at college. He was also an attendant at our wedding 28 years ago yesterday. We have so many funny stories to share... Tim was known as "Handy Hanks Helper" a phrase that he and my husband coined as they would check on road kill. Anyways we lost touch with Tim when he was in Olean. We tried to get together then lifes circumstances....Please know how devastated we are and are grieving today. (We just found out about Tims death from the Oswego alumni magazine) Please forward our thoughts to Tims wife and children

Lisa & Keith Parsons Falmouth Maine